This blog is going to stop updating on Wednesdays. I made a deal with my self that I'd work on writing more stories and less random stuff for free. This is a good thing for you, Dear Reader, because I'll have fewer days where I have nothing much to say. :) Seriously, coming up with anything new to say some days is very difficult. My life simply isn't that interesting. And every post can't be about Feminism. That's exhausting. Although, today's post is going to be about song lyrics. Specifically, Jack White's Connected By Love. Because this morning I turned on Spotify and it played the first few lines of the song and I almost immediately wanted to punch Jack White in the nuts.
But first read this article: #MeToo isn’t enough. Now women need to get ugly. It'll explain the cultural mindset of women at this moment. Now, read this article about Toxic Masculinity and Emotional Labor: Why Women Are Tired: The Price of Unpaid Emotional Labor. The deal is this: emotions are a vital, necessary aspect of being human. People cannot exist without them. Touch--casual touch, even, like hugs from friends--is a physical need. It is possible to die from a lack of touch. (see this experiment with monkeys and wire mesh/cloth mothers.) Now, have a look at this:
Also, have a look at this Tumblr article about Simon Pegg and Nick Frost. And lastly, watch this interview.
With all of that in mind, I think I can finally understand why men feel so very deeply the need for a woman in their lives--so much so that they're willing to go to any length, even to the point of enslavement or rape, to get what they need. It explains the abuse and the entitlement. It explains so, so much. It doesn't excuse it. Not. One. Bit. But now I see how things got this way. It needs to change for Men's sake as well as for Women's. So, now let's get back to that Jack White song. Here are the lyrics:
Woman, don't you know what I'm suffering from?
Ease my pain, make it wash on with the rain Relieve me and put it up on your shelf Take it away, and give it to somebody else 'Cause I know we're connected by love Yes, I know we're connected, connected, connected by love Yeah, I wanna be directed by your love Connected by love Friend of mine, you seem to know me best You chose me out of all of the rest Take me home with you, and help me forget Let's take the worst and somehow turn it into the best [repetitive stuff cut for brevity] What have I done? I have pushed away everyone Help me forget Let's put it all to bed Forgive me, and save me From myself Don't forsake me, woman And go and choose somebody else Here's the video. It doesn't make the lyrics any better. In fact, I feel it confirms my interpretation.
Fuck you, dude. Come on, men. Do your own emotional labor. Grow up. Learn to take care of yourself. Cultivate deep friendships with other straight men, if you're a straight man. Get some therapy. Learn how to be an emotional adult for the sake of humanity. And when you're ready to be an emotional adult partner to a woman, she'll be interested. Stop putting all that on women. Just stop. It's not good for anyone.
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Stina Leichtis a Science Fiction and Fantasy author living in Texas. Archives
March 2023
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